Today’s post is very special one. Erin, a fellow photographer, is interested in exploring boudoir photography but have some personal hang-ups and personal issues that she needs to work through before she can fully embrace photographing other people and truly understand their experience being in front of the camera.
“As a woman I probably look in the mirror everyday and spend more time than I should wishing I could change something and less time than I should loving my physically self.”
I feel so honoured and glad that she came to me.
Erin and her fiance recently just took possession of their new home and really look forward to renovate the place to become their very own. When I walk into the new house, I know deep inside I need to incorporate some of the unique characters of the house, which will soon be gone after the renovation. Hopefully after this session, it would be a fresh starts to Erin coming out from this experience, loving herself more and building a wonderful life and family in this new home.
Today, Erin wrote me this email:
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Vulnerability. There is a certain sense of power in it. There is a sense of fear as well. Being vulnerable makes us human and allows us to make true connections with other humans. In a way, genuine human connection is the seed from which happiness grows. Arguably the strongest connections we share with others come from a place of vulnerability.
So here I am. 33 and not comfortable with who I am. More confident than a teenager but still unsure of where I fit in. Both in the world in general and also in my own skin.
There it is. My own skin. Only a few paragraphs in and it comes out.
Our bodies. They are a true feat of bioengineering. And yet, we take them for granted. We hate them. We wish perfection on them. We treat them badly and don’t give them the love and support they need to thrive. And then we throw expectations at them. We want them to look a certain way. We want them to be appealing. Some of us define ourselves by what our bodies look like. Some of us obsess over it.
I am not perfect. My thighs are a little jiggly. I will never have a flat stomach. My breasts …. my hips …. my skin. The list goes on. Why do I hate the body that enables me to live my life in this physical world? It’s so senseless. My body is wonderful. My body is perfect the way it is. I should love my body. It allows me to experience the world around me. I can feel the loving touch of my partner. I can hear beautiful music. I can taste food from every culture. I can read books that are inspiring. I can run until my lungs hurt. I can see the sunrise and feel the warmth of the sun on my skin.
So who cares about being perfect? Why should I care about living up to some unrealistic standard? I have a partner who loves me, who is excited by my body. Who let’s me experience my body in a totally wonderful way.
It’s time women and men love themselves a little more. Our bodies are amazing, our bodies are perfect the way they were made. Use your body to experience the world. Make connections with other people and experience them fully. Be vulnerable, plant the seed for happiness. It’s so worth it.
Having this photo session done was scary. But the experience was so worth it. I did it because it scared me. I put myself in a vulnerable position. Both in posing for the session and releasing the photos for publication online. The latter statement is almost more scary, really. But I am so glad I did it. I can let go of some of that self hate, really, is that worth my time or energy? It’s not.
So here’s to feeling comfortable in my own skin. Nobody else is going to do it for me.
Thanks Boon!
Cheers,
Erin
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Erin has since started photographing boudoir. This makes me so happy for her. This is such a wonderful and positive experiences for both of us.
The stories are all that matters.
Don’t forget the music accompaniment.
This session is edited with the awesome DMWL Lightroom Presets. It’s currently on sale right now, so grab it while it last.